Grief Explained

Weeks after the funeral, they were all still grieving. George had stopped sleeping in their room and had taken refuge in the living room couch. Mr. Weasley always seemed to still confuse his once twins but if he was doing it intentionally to feel like he still had both, no one was sure. Mrs. Weasley, who seemed to be grieving the most, still washes his son's clothes every week even if no one had actually the guts to wear them.

Harry watched all of this everyday. He was alternately guilty and pained. The little happiness he felt over having defeated Voldemort faded every day he watched the Weasleys mourn over their loss. He had began spending most of his days outside, flying in Ron's broomstick all over the place and trying to forget the worst inside the house.

It was in one of these days that Ginny found him, suspended in the air and hovering over the fields. "Do you not plan to go down for lunch?" she asked, looking down at the house.

"Hey there," Harry replied with a small smile. She was still radiant, Ginny. Even if the loss of her brother had taken most of the light out of her eyes.

"Mum's asked me to call you. Reckoned you'd be here, Hermione saw you take off. Come on down, Harry."

"Do you think they could ever forgive me? That you could ever forgive me?"

"For what? For saving the whole of the wizarding world? That's hardly a sin, you know."

"I didn't mean that. I meant being the reason for your loss. Every day, I think about all those times I could have stopped that brewing war from happening. I think about how I could have saved him. Or how I could have given all of you enough protection."

"We don't blame you for what happened, Harry. We could never do that. Without you, we might lose all of our lives that night."

"All of your sacrifices. I try to find every single way to repay them. But every single time, I seem to make you bear more sufferings."

"Will you quit that Harry Potter?!" Ginny shouted at him.

Startled, Harry turned to see her glowering at him. Her radiant face was red and her jaw was so set she seemed to have forgotten how to unlock it.

"Do you not realise how we were so close to losing you? Do you not know how we were so frightened of that? Mum, Ron, Hermione, me! We love you. Fred loved you. He was willing to sacrifice his life for you. We knew what we were getting into the day we accepted you in our family. We knew all the possibilities when we went to Hogwarts and decided to fight with you. And for your information, we wanted to help every bit as much for ourselves than for you! Now come down and eat with us!"

It was the first time Ginny spoke of those things. Harry was shattered. He started to fly back to the ground with all of Ginny's words in his mind. It's time to return all the favors. The Weasleys were his family already. He would grieve with them and show them everyday how much he loved them.

First Choice

I was running and running like I had never run in my life. It's as if my entire life depended on every step I take regardless of the direction it was headed. I could still hear the sounds of the cannon even if I felt like I was already worlds away from the Cornucopia. The raging shouts of the killers were mixed so well with the agonizing screams of their victims. I kept on looking behind me for signs of any pursuer and thankfully, none had paid enough attention yet--not that I thought there would be any of course.

After what seemed like years, I stopped behind a large a tree trunk. I patted it carefully for any deadly sap or pins and, when I was quite sure it was safe, collapsed against it. Like I said, I ran like I had never done before. My heart was pounding angrily against my chest, my blood rushing to my brain like a burst of ocean waves, and both of my legs were numb. I was so tired I could actually drop dead from it any minute now. But I could not.

I wondered where she was already. Ten seconds into the plate and I knew what she was thinking of when her eyes widened at the sight of the bow and arrow. I glared at her, willing her to look at me. She did, thankfully. I shook my head ever so slightly and I was glad that I gave her that distraction. She could kill me right there because I took her away from her most precious friends but I saw Glimmer was already headed for it and I could not risk her like that.

As my body was already screaming wildly, I had to find a bunch of leaves to hide under and rest for quite a while. There were so many trees but my heavy body would not allow me even a feet away from the ground. So I settled under a neat bush surrounded by smaller trees. It was growing dark after all and the place had gone more silent.

Snap, snap. The sound of breaking twigs and crackling dried leaves alerted me. Damn, I slept. Barely a couple of hours inside the arena and I was already letting my guard down. Thankfully, the bushes kept me well hidden. I wondered how many times I would be using the word "thankfully" from now on.

"I lost her! I was at her and she slipped away!" I heard a girl's angry voice whine.

"We'll get her again, Clove. The arena could not be this big. She's out here somewhere, hiding," a boy's assured drawl replied.

"Yeah, Cato's right. She ran so she might not really be up for a good fight. Taking her down should be easy." Another girl's voice, more thrilling.

"Just find her already, alright?" A second boy's bored tones.

My body froze more and more as the voices multiplied. I wondered how many there were. But no one else followed so I assumed there were only four. Four. Two from each deadly district. They could be the only ones making alliances this early in the game. And who was that girl they were talking about that they were so desperate to find and, I shuddered at the thought, kill?

"Katniss, crazy name. Who would name their kid Katniss?" the whining voice, Clove's, spat bitterly.

"Whatever her name is will be forgotten already once her face shows up at the sky any night from now," the second boy's bored voice was shot with excitement.

I trembled so badly I knew the bushes could be moving along with me. Katniss. They were talking about her. They were talking about finding her. About killing her. I could not stop myself from shaking.

"Who's there?!" the first boy, Cato, shouted. Alert.

It was now or never. And I had to decide fast. Katniss . . . My first ever choice inside the arena.

"You wanna find her? Maybe I know how to . . ." I said, revealing myself under the bush. I grinned at them in the most menacing way I could. My hands were still shaking so I folded them behind my head.

"I'm Peeta. Her lover. Remember?"